The Long and Short of It

(I was much cuter than this.)

I enjoy young dogs.

When I have time to bum around, I google ‘puppy love’ or ‘corgi member’. There are some sick-o’s out there, and I want to catch them. They visit bad websites, so I visit them, too, so I can get a feel for what their sick, perverted minds are up to.

I am the Corgi Member of the GOP family values committee. That is why I google ‘corgi member’. Honest.

Some really jealous liberal bipeds are trying to say that we do not have any values at all, except maybe bargain basement values. That is because they have a nanny filter on their computers, and we do not, because we have to boldly go onto the web and check out smut. We are brave and true.

Ever since 9/11 I have been humping like crazy to keep on top of puppy porn. The terrorists will try anything. We must fight them on the web so they do not come to America.